It's been awhile since i've done this, but here it goes.

Final Fantasy XI before real life shit.

Finally hit 73smn yesterday, got another merit into Great Katana skill. It has become more of a chore to get summoner to 75. I usually end up playing Oblivion while I wait for a party, or if I'm soloing I end up getting distracted easily. I really need to work on merits for my samurai, and get Tachi: Rana while i'm at it. I managed to get the 3 add-ons, I'm almost done with A Crystalline Prophecy and haven't even started the others. My plan is to augment the gear for use on my smn mainly because the job lacks a lot of good gear that others have. I really need to kill Fenrir soon, I'm sick of telling people that I don't have him and then being made fun of for it.

Now for the real life crap.

I managed to get a job finally. I just gotta contact the manager to see when I have to go in and fill out the paperwork. I'm probably gonna have to leave my dynamis shell for some time because I'll be working 5-8/9pm.

Now for the only bad/depressing thing I have to write.

About a year ago I was dating this girl. I truly thought, more like believed, she was the one for me. We dated for about a month before she broke up with me. Bad part about that, she did it in a text message, which really hurt. She says it's because I reminded her of a previous relationship. She still wanted to be friends, and so did I.

About a month ago I read a manga called Rave, it's on onemanga.com. I'm not gonna ruin it simply because it's a great story. I was fine reading it until the last 20 or so chapters. What happens between and to the main characters opened a wound that I though was healed. Since then I've been kinda depressed. I don't know if my friends and family have noticed, or maybe I'm just putting on a "mask" that's keeping them from finding out. I wanna tell her how I really feel, but I'm afraid that it'll ruin what we have left of our friendship. I'm also worried that if she rejects me, that I'll have to say goodbye, and I really don't want to.

I haven't told anyone else about this dilemma. I've got till about mid-december to figure our what to do.